December 31st, 08:35PM

I'm home alone with my puppies.
I just took dinner and in the silence I could think.
While I was eating I had all kind of thoughts, so I decided to write here.

I ate some fish my mom left home for me.
She bought it already cooked at the fish stand of the market yesterday morning.
It didn't taste good.
I was thinking it was annoying, then I remembered something.
That fish, gave his life for become my food. I should at least be grateful of it!
So I felt like crying, once again, and it's weird but the taste of the fish turned better.

I also remembered that someone... A friend, who is a chef, the past year told me that when he kills fish or other sea animals for cooking them at the restaurant where he works, he feels really bad...
So, someone that works there as dishwasher, and he's a native american, taught him a prayer for thanking and saying sorry to all the animals who die for becoming our food. I thought it was great, even though I still feel bad for them...

Speaking about it, that friend is someone who really hurt me. He isn't anymore in my life since November of the past year.
He was the kind of person who came back to town after 10 years spent working in another city, and randomly entered in my life careless. Then, after we were close and having asked for my help he disappeared, and re-came back after few months.
Then, after becoming really close to me, bringing back a lot of thing of the past, and having totally used me for solving all his problems...
(Because I was stupid enough to do everything I could for helping a friend, even though my health sucked and my situation wasn't so good)
Anyway, after all these things, he disappeared definitely, leaving me alone few days before my birthday, without saying a single "thank you" or explaining why he suddenly got cold and distant before to disappear.

Well, I'm going out of the topic so... Where we was?
Oh yeah, at my New Year's Eve dinner LOL

Before, I said "I felt like crying once again". Yep, because in these days I feel so sad, and I got easily mad. It's not because I'm alone this night, I'm used to it, plus, this year it was my choice. I really don't mind to be together with my puppies, I think it's the best instead ^^

The feeling of sadness is gave from the fact I haven't did anything good in this year that is going to finish. I don't like myself, I don't have any confidence, so I couldn't do anything.
It's not the world fault, it's not my country situation's fault, it's just me, who hasn't been strong enough to step forward and make my own future, my own life.
I know, but I haven't the guts of admitting it, so I keep on despising myself
deep insight, and getting angry and sad.

I'm so stupid and useless...
I hate that my parents always considered me as the "Stupid, ugly and useless" one,
but... They were right..
I always said I prefer the truth, said face to face...
But I guess this is the only case I would have liked that they lied.
I would have liked that they pretended to love me for giving me the self confidence and the strength to face my life.


Putting all these depressing things aside, I want to say anyway "Thank you" to this year.
Because as I always thought, everything happens for some reason, even though maybe we can't understand the true reason when that thing happens...
So, for this year 2014, I think it's the same...
Right now I feel like there wasn't anything good for me on this year, but...
Maybe there was, and I still can't see it...
So, Year 2014, thank you!

Speaking about the change of the year...
I don't know how old I was when I heard about this thing but...
This is the representation I always liked about the change of the year:
The old year, is a reeeally old man with long white hair and beard.
He's so tired, slow and weak, and he's gonna die. But he's not scared about death,
because he has come across his path.
In the moment he will die, a baby will born: The new year.
This baby will grow day by day, becoming a kid, a teenager, a man, an old man...
Until he will die on the next december.

So, this is the representation I like about the year... But... I always felt bad for the poor old man...
"Why he has to die?!" I always thought.
Well, I'm the kind of person who felt bad about a lot of things...
For example when I ate vegetables or fruits I ask myself: "And if this vegetable/fruit can feel the pain, and I'm making it suffer while I'm eating it?"
Or when I throw away some object, I think "What if it feels sad because I'm trowing it away?"
Yep I'm a weirdo...
But...
After all what we know? Maybe they really have feelings and we don't know...

Ok, let's stop here with these kind of speakings or I'll never end this thing...
I was here for saying "thank you" isn't it?
So, it's better if I do it.

My "thank you" is for all the creatures living and not living who had part in my life during this year, but here I'll wrote only the persons who have a LJ for simplify the things.

So...

Thank you for the first friends I met in the fandom, years ago.
jemjem86 , thank you to be my friend. Even though we had tempestous periods and sometimes we haven't understood each other we're still here! I think it's great.
silentkat76 , cyloveyourself thank you very much for being my friends, for dealing everyday with me, with my annoyng requests about the fansub, and not saying me "just goes to the hell" LOL
You're really so kind, girls!
Oh, right, thank you also to all the persons who follow our fansub.


Thank you to the Madozoku members I got to know during the last years...
hikaeru , you already know how much I like and respect you as person, and I'm so happy to be your friend!
Thank you for everything! 本当に本当に本当に本当に (PS: You're a great teacher!)
drowsy_observer , you know I love you, right? We ended up being similar and liking the same things, so it always was simple to talk, to rant and everything else! Thank you to be my friend, and part of my life!
yararanger ,  you're just so cute that I can't! Thank you to be yourself as the person you are! And sorry for always sounding weird and annoying... I'm the kind of person who makes a lot of messes trying to be helpful for people >.<
raven_weasley , you're a person so funny and interesting! Thank you to be always so friendly with me <3
I hope we'll end up knowing each other more during 2015!
yoki_seity , thank you to always say "thank you" to someone like me, who doesn't deserve so much kindness!

Thank you to all the fandom friends! Guys, you made up my days when I was in a bad period...
I was able to keep on living thank you to your support!
shisaigas , thank you for all our "deep" talks about all sort of things and all you're suggestions! It's been so fun! I hope we will keep on like that ^^
himaori ,  thank you so much for all you taught me and for being a so nice friend! And also for understanding my "weird" way to be a fans!
sky_fish7 ,  thank you for always be so warm and cheerful with me! You're such a sweet person! I hope we'll be friends for looong loong time ne~
niji_bunny , thank you for everything, really! I miss you, and I hope you're doing fine, finding your answers and your path. Stay healthy and take care, please... Wherever you are!
tomapiya ,  thank you for your huge kindness! You're so nice with everyone that it's so easy be friend with you!
hakucchan, thank you for having been always so nice with me even though I asked weird questions and made weird talks!


Thank you also to all the people I ended up knowing only recently! I hope in the next year we'll know each other more!
rosa_elefante , yukiko_no_niji , ichigo_85 , mizuki_ichigou , naryabutterfly and all the others!



Thank you guys!!

I'm counting on you for the 2015 too!!

So... I think no one will read all this thing from the beginning to the end but...
If someone will do it, thank you! And sorry if you find typos or grammar mistakes...
I haven't beta readed what I wrote, and I'm half asleep LOL


I wish all of you a great 2015!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!

Pelko Azrael

Hello guys~
(Hey you guys! Guys Playzone!) ← No, this line isn't in the topic, but lately every time I say/write/read/listen to the word "guys" the song comes to my mind~

Anyway...
Days ago, I promised to my papa/imouto(?) Erunyan, that I would explained her the real story of Cinderella... And I also still have to explain her what the hell I studied in high school, since she was surprised when I said her I studied Architecture XD

Another thing.... Please, hikaeru , stay safe! After what happened today in the crazy country where you live, I'm so worried about what can happen to you, that I really can't...
Sorry for being so annoying.


So... The subjects I studied in high school were:
Math [5 years] (algebra, arithmetic, geometry, trigonometry, analytic, science statistics, probability); physics [2 years] (Classical mechanics, Quantum mechanics, matter, electromagnetism, Astrophysics); chemistry [2 years] (Organic chemistry, Inorganic chemistry, cultural heritage chemistry) ; Earth science [1 year] ; biology [1 year] ; Italian grammar [2 years], Literature [5 years](mostly italian and european), poetry, epic poetry, narrative ; UK Literature -in english -(poetry and narrative) [3 years] ; History of art [5 years] ; History of UK art -in english- [3 years] ; english grammar [2 years] ; Philosophy [3 years]; World History (focused on italian and european history) [2 years] ; Right and economy [2 years] ; Painting techniques [5 years] ; plastic arts and sculpture [2 years] ; architecture and urban planning [5 years] ; Project&Design [3years](Graphic Design -without pc softwares- , color theory and psychology, layout, Shape psychology, advertising) ; Physical education (both theoretical and practical) [5 years]
 ← I think it's all...

And now, I can finally talk about the real story of Cinderella.
(This is something that anyone who attended italians high school studied -or should have studied- so I'll write only in english.)

As the most of you know, Cinderella was written by the french writer Charles Perrault and later revisited by the Brothers Grimm. But the original story was written by the italian writer Giambattista Basile, who seems took inspiration from Egyptian tradition and chinese folklore (but this thing isn't still proved so, don't take it for sure, please)

Basile's story is different from the one we know...
And it's something like this:

once upon a time, lived a widower prince, who deeply loved his daughter, named Zezolla. He gave her the best teacher he could, for make her learn a lot of good things, and Zezolla was really happy but.. The new wife of his father didn't like her.

The girl was always scared by the stepmother, and she was always complaining with her teacher, saying she wanted the teacher was her mother...Until when...The teacher said her to her: "Just say to your stepmother you need an old dress, from the ones inside the chest, and when she'll lower, break her neck with the lid of the chest."

Zezolla did it, and then persuaded her father to marry her teacher.
After the marriage, Zezolla met a dove, which said her if she was in need she could call for her, "the dove of the Fairies from Sardinia island".
For a week the teacher was a good mother for the girl, and then, she introduced to the prince her 6 daughter she kept secret until then. The father was so into the stepdaughters that forgot about Zezolla, who ended up becoming a waitress, dressed in rags, who slept in front of the kitchen's fireplace, that's why they changed her name on "Cinderella" (Cinderella).

One day the father had to go to Sardinia island for job, and asked to all his daughters what they wanted as gift from the island.
The stepdaughters replied stuff like jewels, clothes... But Cinderella said to the father he only had to ask to the Sardinia's Dove to bring her something, and that he hadn't to forget about it, no matter what, or he would been blocked on the sea.

The prince remembered the stuff for the stepdaughters but not the thing to do for Cinderella, and his ship couldn't depart from the harbor, but the master of the ship, dreamed about a fairy, and the fairy said him that the prince forgot about his daughter request. So, the day after, the prince went to the
fairie's cavern, and received from the fairies a seed, a hoe, a golden bucket and a silk tablecloth for Cinderella, who had to farm the seed.

In a week the seed became a big plant, and a fairy came out from the plant asking for Cinderella desire. The girl said she would like going out to the home without her sisters knew about it. The fairy taught her a magic formula and she was magically dressed in a beautiful way, and sitting in a carriage.

When she was out home, the king noticed her, and fell for her beauty, so he asked to his servant to follow her and discover who she was, but Cinderella was able to escape, and came back home.
It happened again, and again, until when, during her runaway, Cinderella lost a shoe...
Then the servant bring the shoe to the King, who searched the owner of the shoe between all the women of the reign, and when he found Cinderella, he made of her his Queen. *Singing "King&Queen&Joker" by Sexy Zone*


THE END


Well, it's similar to the modern version, isn't it?
But here there isn't the midnight stuff, and above all...
Cinderella is actually a murderer, not a innocent poor girl.
Here, in the first part of the tale she's a spoiled kid who kills her stepmother for get what she want,
and, even though she did something bad, she had the fortune to met the magic dove who quickly settled all her problems...
In the modern version, she's a pure girl who had only 1 stepmother (not 2) who was really bad, however she stay honest and worked hard, until the fairy went to rescue her, and thanks to this immaculate image they were able to come up with a moral, which isn't in the original story.
That's why the story is called "La Gatta Cenerentola" (the Cat Cinderella), because the girl, was sly and cunning like a cat ^^


Ok... That's all... Thank you for reading until the end...
I hope I didn't forget anything...Well I studied this stuff 10-11 years ago, so I can't be enough accurate, but I hope I explained a bit the thing...

Well, now I'm really tired, so...
Goodnight everyone!

Yeee hello minna-san!
It's been so long since I wanted to write this post, but somehow I hadn't the time for writing it...
And I can't remember anymore all the thing I wanted to say but....

Two weeks ago, the release of ジャニズWEST (Johnny's WEST) single debut was announced!
And the single they chosen is ええじゃないか ( Ee? Ja Nai Ka? ← Eh? Isn't it? )
Ureshii desuuuu! I fell in love to that song at the first listen!
It remembers me a lot the first 関ジャニ∞'s ( Kanjani8's ) songs!
If someone still hadn't heard it, I ripped a Shokura performance and converted in a audio file HERE.


I'm so happy and proud of them~
And above all this is the first debut I experience first hand!
I mean, when my beloveds A.B.C-Z debuted, 2 years, 1 month and 22 days ago,
I was following them only since few months and I still didn't know about their past and stuff...
So... This is the 1st time that I really see some junior I love debuting...


And I really, really, really hope that their bond will stay strong and that nothing terrible will happen...
I mean... The first JE group I fell in love (and that introduced me to JE) was KAT-TUN, and...
Look at what happened to them in the last 4 years....
Looking back at the old shows, when they were still juniors make me think they were the most talented and
bright group ever... But then lots of things happened and... It made suffer so much their fans...
(Thank you a lot to my new friend L. for telling me about the old days, when I still wasn't aware about JE, Japanese entertainment and this kind of stuff)

Anyway, back to JWest issue...
(Yes, I decided to call them JWest or JW)
The single will be released in 5 damn versions!!
Here the details from J-web:
( Read more... )

And now I wonder what will happen to their Album debut...
Yes, because at first they had to debut with an Album...
And they were still in the middle of choosing the song to include...